A Little Bit of Perspective...

As per usual I must offer my disclaimer. Even though I'm not entirely sure this post will require one I have to throw out there that I have an uncanny ability, a gift if you will, to offend people with a mere look or innocent phrase. So be forewarned if you are of the more gentle kind I advise that you close this page and move on. Either that or allow your testicles to descend and read on. Oh, and I say fuck. A LOT.

   So yeah I know it's been a while since I've gone on any type of rant or rave or bitch or moan or however the fuck you like to put it. That thing called life got in the way and although I know some of you crave my words, sometimes I just have other shit to do. 

   You may be wondering what this particular post is about. That makes two of us because I have no fucking idea. I just have a lot on my mind and thought I'd spew it out to the masses. This is going to come forth in no particular order. So let's get started shall we. 

   Ok so I guess I'll go back to the elections, because honestly I'm a little butt hurt about the way many people reacted to it. First and foremost let me say this. I never drank the Obama Kool-Aid and I think Romney is a douche. If you follow the money trail they're both propped up by the same kind of mega-corporations so really what choice did we have. Oh yeah, we did have some pretty kick ass third party candidates. Now here is where I got a little pissed off. I researched all the candidates who were listed on NY State's ballot. I looked at who supports them financially, what lobbyists they are affiliated with, what their political track record has been, and then where they stand on the big and small issues. After looking at a lot of this I made the decision to vote for Gary Johnson because he aligned most with what I think we need to do in this country. I made an educated choice people. 

   Me being me, I didn't hide who I voted for and when people asked I fuckin' told them straight out. What was fucked up is that people got legitimately upset by my decision. Some said that I might as well have voted for Obama while others insisted I completely wasted my vote. You know what I have to say to that? FUCK YOU. If you vote. If you participate. If you do your research and vote for who you believe in. HOW IN THE FUCKING FUCK ARE YOU WASTING YOUR VOTE?!?!?! Fuck you. That's bullshit. If you voted for Obama, if you voted for Romney, if you voted for Ron Paul or another write in, if you voted for Gary Johnson or any of the other third party candidates (and there were a lot of them this election) then for the love of fuck you didn't waste your vote. You exercised your right to vote for what YOU believe in. That ladies and gentlemen is what this Republic is all about. We vote for the people that we think and feel will represent our personal values best. 

   Now let me throw a little perspective in there for you. Almost 240 years ago a group of men got together and decided to start a revolution so they could have and vote for representation in Government. Here we are now. With numerous small revolutions in between to end slavery, civil rights, to give women the right to vote, etc. That all happened here in this country. News flash. In Afghanistan and Iraq your service members have fought and died to give those people the right to vote in their own damn countries. I personally disagree with this. If they wanted it that bad they would have stood up and done the shit themselves just like we did. Oh and for those of you thinking, "Yeah but look at who they would be fighting, Saddam had tanks and shit and in Afghanistan the Taliban was ruling with an Iron Fist." Ok, I can almost see your ignorant point. HOWEVER, America has the strongest and most funded military in the World. So by your logic that little insurgency thing we've been fighting for a fucking decade shouldn't be an issue. But it is. They could have done that to fight for their freedom just like we did all those years ago. Back to my perspective. When I saw people walking out of a voting booth in tears because they were finally given a choice it kind of changed my perspective a little. I no longer felt that I needed to vote along party lines or to keep someone out of office. I felt like I had to vote for who I felt was right. For who I felt would do the best job for my country. That's it. That to me honors what so many people have fought and died for in our country throughout the years. 

   Veteran's Day. I'm honestly a little annoyed that it's only one day a year. I know many people do A FUCKING SHIT TON for vets throughout the year and I love them for it. Why not have a Veteran's awareness month though. I mean we have awareness months and heritage and history months for everything fucking else. Why not do it for those who fight for our freedoms. I mean it makes sense to me. Now I'm not looking for any personal praise. I may be a combat vet. Yeah I've gone to other countries and killed in the name of Uncle Sam, Apple Pie, and the American way, but I'm not a hero. I enlisted to do it. I chose to be in the infantry. I chose to stay in and reenlist over the years. My choice. I knew the risks. I knew the sacrifice involved. I didn't do it for praise. I did it for an opportunity to serve my country and make a difference in the world. Although right now, I'm not sure if our political leaders are having us make the right kind of difference in the world. But that my friends is an entirely different subject. 

   All I want for veterans is a fair look from the populace of our country. Many join for selfish reasons, myself included, we want the benefits. The free education. The medical. The chance to see the world. The intangible qualities that a military lifestyle can infuse in a person. These are all things for us. The difference is that we signed a contract recognizing that those things that we wanted involved potential risk and sacrifice. The thing is I want people to be a little more aware and concerned about that risk and sacrifice. We've got homeless and jobless vets. Vets suffering with PTSD, lost limbs, fragmented lives, difficulty adapting to civilian life, just so many afflictions. Regardless of their reasons for serving, they served, and they should be taken care of after service. Especially those coming home wounded or broken in some way shape or form. Believe me, it's not easy, but we do it only some need more help than others.

   Imagine being in the shoes of that 22 year old kid who just finished his time on active duty. He went and fought in war. Saw his friends and brothers maimed and killed. Woke up every morning wondering if this morning would be his last. He lived with stress unimaginable for most people. Hell too many of our society have nervous break downs from sitting in traffic. Imagine how it must feel coming from a place where a traffic jam is a death trap begging for an ambush. I want more awareness of that. The heart felt thanks, free meals, welcome homes, etc. are great. But we need people to be aware of what Vets have gone through, what they need, what is or isn't available to them, and where our government is failing miserably in these areas. Without that, people will continue to move forward in their bubble only pausing on certain days to think about it. Not all, but many live just like that. We need to improve. We need to make it better. We as a people need to take care of our own. 

   Oh and for my fellow Veterans out there. I offer a humble challenge. I challenge you to take the cost of that free meal or discount you may have received and send it to the Veterans charity of your choice. Pay it forward. We are supposed to take care of our own. Never leave a Marine (soldier, sailor, or airman) behind. IF everyone of us took the amount we received in thanks monetarily and paid it forward then we could make a huge difference among our own. Thank those who thank us by taking that gift and moving it forward. 

   There's more... but you know what? I think I'm going to end it there. I think I'm going to let you guys mull over voting and veterans and allow you to express your own opinions. Without discussion and discourse there can be no progress. And right now, our country as a whole needs a lot of progress.

Respectfully,

The Senator

9/11, Not Just a Cry for Help Anymore...

First and foremost, my disclaimer.

If you can be offended, I'll probably do it. So if you cannot handle being offended don't cry to me because the fuck I used to give was sacrificed for virgins, or bacon, or possibly wings, beer is also a good one. Either way to sum it up I don't give a fuck if I hurt your feelings.

Secondly... and this is the important bit. This blog is the opinion of the author and only the author. It is not, nor is it intended to represent, the opinions of the U.S. Government, the Department of Defense, the Department of the Navy, the United States Marine Corps or any subordinate command that I forgot to mention. It is also expressly not the opinion of anyone who could even remotely have court martial authority over me. Therefore, I say again, this is the opinion and ONLY the opinion of one disgruntled individual, le me.

Now on to things.... well before I get started I gotta warn you that this is truly a rant. I'm pissed off and irritated and frustrated and all things in between. This also may go on too long because my thoughts, no matter how hard I try, are disorganized. I'm not really proof reading... I'm giving it to you from the heart, pure and simple.

On September 11, 2001 our lives were changed forever. We lost something that day other than lives. Our "That won't happen here" bubble was burst. The thing is... it fucking happened. It's done. We can't go back in time and undo it. There is no Ctrl Z in life. Please watch this. It'll be worth your time. It's Jon Stewart's Response to 9/11.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SXcmc2AZ6ZE

Now here's the thing that gets me. We lost nearly 3,000 lives that day. In innocent civilians and with the first responders. Then, even before the dust settled, we were at war. Here we are. Eleven fucking years later. Still at war. And for what? For what? Tell me! I don't fucking understand why we are still doing this shit. Why am I still seeing my friends and former Marines on the DoD website announcements as the latest killed in a war? Eleven fucking years. This pisses me off, but that's not all.

Today, for some reason, probably because it's an election year and during the last election I hadn't succumbed to the life trap that is bookface, but today I saw something that disgusted me beyond belief that I hadn't noticed before. Maybe it's because my thoughts and opinions have changed a bit. Maybe it's because I've been reading a lot more. Maybe it's because somewhere over the past few years I may have grown up a little bit. Obviously that growing up a little bit is subject to debate but that's not truly the point. Something in me has changed and I saw this manifestation of humanity that I thought I would only see in war. A manifestation that damn near brought me to my knees in pain.

I saw people taking the tragic events of 9/11 and using them as a means to point out how their political party was doing more than the other. I saw people justifying eleven fucking years of war and justifying future wars. I saw people disrespecting the dead by pointing out possible conspiracy theories. On ANY other day I couldn't give a fuck if you did this. ANY other fucking day. HOWEVER, today is NOT one of those days. Today is a day we should remember those who died and honor their lives. NOT turn their death into some fucking twisted ass means for you to prove your point. If you did this, and you know who the fuck you are, I give you a sentiment from the cockles, maybe even the sub-cockles of my heart. That sentiment. FUCK YOU. If you don't like it here's another sentiment. GO FUCK YOURSELF. I truly mean that. You could be my best friend and tomorrow will be a new day but right now, in this moment, I truly mean that. Honor them, remember them, DON'T use them.

I was originally going to go on about what I think about war. After having fought in a few. But I'm not going to. Because it isn't about that. It isn't about "Patriot Day". In fact whoever fucking decided to call it Patriot Day can suck my fucking dick because today isn't about patriotism. Today is about those we lost on our own soil. Today is about honoring them, remembering them, and NOTHING else. Losing nearly 3,000 people shouldn't inspire Patriotism. Loyalty to your country and her people should be your source of Patriotism. If 9/11 is your calling as a Patriot you seriously need to re-examine yourself. It SHOULD have changed your life and perspective. It should not have made you a Patriot.

Gah. FUCK. Listen. My point is this. We lost something that day. Something we held near and dear to us. We lost a little of our personal freedom. We thought we could live our lives in peace without interference from others. That was ripped away. We were attacked. If you want a true comparison. Talk to a rape victim about how they felt after they were raped. I bet you'll find that the individual you talked to probably felt very similar to how you felt that day. Then ask yourself, "Did that rape victim become some type of patriot?" 

You may tell me that the last point has nothing to do with it, it's not a good comparison and I'll ask you why. Because we both had something ripped away from us without our permission. Forcibly taken. The how and why doesn't matter. It's in the past. From that point on it's coping and growing from a tragic experience.

From what I saw today. There are a lot of people who haven't coped or grown from that tragedy.

These are just my thoughts and feelings. My opinions. Take them or leave them.

In honor and remembrance,

The Senator

A Call for Action! "And Then They Came Home."

My disclaimer still applies, as you know, this is par for the course. If you are new to my blog, hopefully you are because with this one I'm appealing far and wide, be advised I have a super hero like ability to offend people. I don't know what it is but I'm exceptionally good at it. Anyways, on to the blog.

On occasion I have been known to pimp out certain things for a good cause. I promise you everything I put out there is near and dear to my heart and normally is underfunded. I spent a great deal of time and effort raising money for the Brain Aneurysm Foundation because my wife nearly died of a ruptured cerebral aneurysm. I've spent time raising money for various charities that ensure the families of our Wounded Warriors are taken care of while they're healing. I've spent some time pimping out a few charities that send stuff to the troops overseas currently deployed to combat zones. I limit the last one because I will only support the charities that send stuff specifically to my fellow combat arms service members located in remote shit-holes out in the middle of nowhere who live off of glorified MRE's, cold inadequate showers, live in shacks supported by sandbags, and generally receive some kind of enemy contact on a regular basis. I only support groups that send stuff to those guys because they are the ones who need it and appreciate it most. IF you are interested in supporting that cause please feel free to visit this site: Support Our Marines. However, this particular blog isn't about any of those. 

This particular blog and pimp session is about something different. It's about those who came home. Those who struggle with the VA. Those who try and rebuild a semblance of their life as they knew it. Those who often times toy with the idea of suicide. Those that you've given your thanks to, waved your flag, and sported that yellow ribbon for. This one is for them. Now, I know many of you truly support the troops and do what you can. You take time to thank them when you see them. You take time to talk with them. You take time to think about them on days where it's not all over the news. For that I thank you.

Yet, at the moment, I have to ask for just a little bit more. All of us who served have sacrificed. We leave our loved ones for long periods of time. Our loved ones often times feel abandoned even though they know why we do what we do. We sacrifice a piece of ourselves without complaint. Some sacrifice more than others and some sacrifice it all. I'd be lying to you if I told you we did it for you, the flag, the country, freedoms, patriotism, or any other intangible thing you can come up with. It may start that way but in the end it boils down to the fact that we willingly lay our lives on the line for each other. When you're over there and you hear that all familiar "zoooo-clack" of a bullet passing near you, you feel the heat from fires of the explosions around you, you feel the pressure of the blast concussion, the adrenaline coursing through your veins, the heightened awareness, or the gut wrenching, soul tearing pain of sending a brother home draped under the American flag all those intangible things fade away. You're left there in horrible inhumane circumstances with two things: you and the men your with. That's it. Then, if you're lucky enough, you go home. To a land more foreign than what you just left. A land filled with hostilities and uncertainty. A land you once knew so well that you can't even identify with any longer. 

That, ladies and gentlemen, is what this is about. 

A young Marine that I had the pleasure of serving with, Garrett Phillip Anderson, is an amazing writer filled with mind blowing ideas. He is also a gifted and talented film maker. He has an idea. He is getting together with some of the Fellujah veterans he knows who survived a horrific day of combat and is filming their story. Not the story of the blood and gore of the day. The story of when they came home. He wants to highlight what veterans go through. What they deal with. Obstacles they have to overcome. Most importantly the fact that the battle is over but the war within themselves continues to rage on unabated. 

You can sample his amazing talents by visiting his blog here:

Iraq/Afghanistan and More 

He has even been featured on numerous occasions in the Doonesbury Military Blog - The Sandbox.

If you took a minute to read any of his posts you'll quickly realize that this guy has the ability to rip your heart out and show you the darkest places you didn't know existed. Can you imagine how powerful his film is going to be? I can. That's why I'm writing this.

Since veterans have sacrificed so much, I want you to do a little sacrificing yourself. I'm not asking much. I'm asking for what you can spare. What you can miss and give up without hurting yourself financially. Can you give up a few drinks? That's enough right there. Seriously, if everyone who read this decided to give $5 to $25 then you've helped more than you'll ever realize. You can show your support through sacrifice by going to the following website and giving what you can.

"And Then They Came Home"

After you've given please make sure to visit and like their Facebook Page here:

Facebook - And Then They Came Home

When you're done doing that I want you to share this blog post and spread it like wild fire. Pass it along as often as possible. Ask others to sacrifice just a little for those who sacrificed so much. Be active. Tell people about it.

Sacrifice, Share, and stand in Solidarity behind those who willingly walk in harms way.

Thanks for listening.

The Senator

Thoughts on War

As per usual, my normal disclaimer applies to all my writing.

I must take a second to express that this is not an official statement. This is the opinion of the author and does not represent the U.S. Government, the Department of Defense, Department of the Navy, the United States Marine Corps, or anyone that I have missed that could potentially court martial the author. This is only the opinion of the author.

Recently I've been posting a lot of anti-war propaganda. Considering I've spent the last 15 years in the Marine Corps infantry many people think this is rather Ironic. I don't. Honestly, I haven't met anyone who has truly experienced war that is really for it. Most of us are caught in this strange type of purgatory where we've grown to truly hate war but miss it terribly. It's exceptionally strange.

If you look in our past the majority of our Nation's leaders were anti-war. Which I find entirely ironic because we go to war so often. Some of the greatest quotes of warfare have escaped the lips of our General's who lead our youth into combat and from the high ranking politicians that declare the war and tell the General's to act. Yet, the next generation of politicians does the same. It's exceptionally strange. 

There is a peculiarity about war that those who have never been in combat will never understand. Good men go to war at our Nation's calling and spill their blood on the battlefield. Each person who returns is forever changed. They've seen and possibly committed horrors that go against their very nature. They are left forever scarred by that experience and left to receive treatment from someone who has never experienced anything like it. My own therapist constantly makes comparisons of my experiences of trauma caused by combat to those who experience trauma caused by a car accident. This perplexes me because I've been in car accidents but I've never had a car transform into something that shot at me. I've never had the opportunity to shoot back when experiencing a car accident. So I've never quite understood my therapists point. I think that maybe where we lose something when it comes to treatment after the fact. The thing is, war is nasty.

Last night I watched a movie entitled "The Season of the Witch". It's not a bad movie, not a great movie either. Yet, in the beginning of the movie there is a sequence of two soldiers serving during the Crusades. In the first several battle scenes they were in combat with regular armies. Their spiritual leader spoke of killing in the name of God. This, by the way, is a strange concept for me but that's an entirely different subject. Then these warriors came upon a siege where after fighting with the outlying forces they broke into a city. In a smoky haze from the fires within the city they set to their duties of attacking those within the walls. As the smoke began to clear all that remained were the slain bodies of women and children. Not another soldier in sight. That scene forced me to pause the movie and walk away from the TV for a few. It was all too familiar. Today we rarely cause devastation with blades yielded by our own hands but we cause even more horrific scenes. 

Today we cause devastation from a distance for most. The majority of that damage is caused by pilots thousands of feet above the earth. By a 19 year old kid thousands of miles away sitting behind a computer screen that shows more the likes of a video game than reality. By bombs that we fling thousands of meters. Most of the devastation is done from a distance. After all most General's preach that you should never send a man where you can send a bombardment of bombs, artillery, and mortars first. Reconnaissance by fire is a standard tactic. It saves the lives of our men by killing nearly everything before they get there. But when they get there they are left to witness what is left.

That's what a lot of people just don't understand. In combat you often wonder what it's all for. Why are we doing this? Why are we doing that? What is this accomplishing? How is this making my country safer?

Again, it's exceptionally strange. War should be kept as a last resort. When all else fails. It shouldn't be a preventative measure. War doesn't prevent much. Not that I can see anyway. Aside from prevention war costs more than the toll on the battlefield. It costs the citizens of the country perpetrating the war. War is, and always has been, expensive. It costs in lives, it costs in mending the wounded, it costs in logistics. Every aspect of war costs. 


War being used as a last resort should also have a clear end-state. Win or lose, war should have that specific end-state: this is it, we've done what we came to do and now we're going home. If an occupation of any form should take place it should be meticulously planned and orchestrated before we even go to war. Not haphazardly put together once you're there. That will only extend the problem. 


Ideally, the threat of war should be enough of a deterrent to prevent war. Yet, we continuously go to war. We continuously attempt to influence everyone else. The result is more pain and suffering for those sent to battle and those who are born witness to what's left afterwards. Those who are sent to wage war are left with their souls torn asunder for what they may have done and what they have witnessed. Those who were innocent of the conflict are left a devastated landscape to attempt to repair. Left with memories of what was done to their life. Left in turmoil. Then the war machine marches on stealing all but a glimmer of hope.


In literature, prose, plays, and movies wars are glorified. Epic battles with heroes defeating villains. Tales of courage. Legends being born. Honor and glory being achieved. A warped reality. I find it odd that the literature of the West glorifies something so horrible. Is it the beginning of the desensitization of an upcoming generation who will then strive to go to war so they can earn their own glory? If only they'd realize that the most glorious moment one can experience is when war is evaded, the war machine sent home, the lives spared, the souls given mercy, the innocence left to remain intact for one more breath.