Guilty Conscious.

Disclaimer: As per usual I have to warn everyone that my language is somewhat colorful. If you are easily offended please stop now and forever hold your peace. For everyone who does continue please feel free to pass this along if you feel it's appropriate. 


Before I even go anywhere with this one I want to key you guys into something. I write to kind of enlighten people who normally wouldn't know how some of us feel. You see, I was once told I have a gift when it comes to the written word. Although I know I'm not that great and I know there is a lot of room for improvement I still seem to have a knack for expressing things. So I write. Dylan Thomas is one of my all time favorite poets and this quote encapsulates how I feel when it comes to writing.


"I do not want to express only what other people have felt, I want to rip something away and show what they have never seen."


So with that, read on.


Have you ever felt guilt? True unadulterated, haunting your soul, compromising your sanity kind of guilt. The kind of guilt that keeps you up at night. The kind of guilt that sometimes makes you wonder if you really deserve to be on this earth among the living. The kind of guilt that makes you question your humanity. The kind of guilt that causes nausea when someone offers thanks for what you've done. The kind of guilt that causes a grief within you that few will ever know. Have you ever felt that kind of guilt?


Many of us have. We try to bury it in places we think will keep it at bay. We try to hide it in a corner of our soul and lock it away. The problem is that it doesn't always work. It comes out and reminds us constantly of what we've done or what we've witnessed or of what we didn't do. It robs us of sleep. It robs us of peace, serenity, and often times the ability to feel happiness. Hell, sometimes it even robs us of the ability to feel any emotions at all. It's debilitating and we live with it constantly. 


Many ask why I don't believe in Heaven or Hell after what I've been through. Here's the simple answer. If hell exists in the afterlife then why have we had to go through it here on Earth?


War is glorified in TV shows, Movies, Music, and in Games. War holds no glory, it holds only horrors. Horrors that follow some the rest of their lives. Horrors that cause some to end that life prematurely. 


In the past I've written about being called a "baby killer" and being accused of committing a plethora of heinous crimes. To be honest, we may have. Have you ever witnessed the devastation caused by a 2,000 lb bomb? You can't recognize what's left. That may have been the enemy, it may have been a dog, a woman, a child, or maybe even a slaughtered goat someone was preparing for dinner. You just never know. Modern weapons are designed to wreck havoc. They do this very effectively. 


Have you ever seen a dying man? Seen the last remnants of life fade from their eyes? Felt the weight of a body that you are carrying to a helicopter to be transported home? Home to a family that just lost their son, brother, fiancee, friend, their loved one, a part of their life that can never be replaced. 


Have you ever opened a van door and realized that wasn't a vehicle born improvised explosive device but a family who didn't know what all those signals meant? No matter what you did to try to get them to stop, they just didn't, they kept barreling towards you. Yesterday, in the same situation, that van exploded. That explosion killed and wounded people that you knew. That explosion killed and wounded your allies. That explosion killed and wounded a lot of innocent civilians. What were you supposed to do?


Have you ever survived something and truly wondered how or why? Have you sat there and contemplated the meaning of life in a broad sense? Dead at 19. Single, young, an entire life ahead of him taken away in an instant. Never having the chance to find that perfect match. Never experiencing raising a child. Never having a chance to experience... Yet you've had that and you wonder why you survived. 


Have you ever seen the tears of a mother when her son is laid to rest before his time? Seen the grief in her eyes and the anger because he died doing something she didn't believe in? The guilt she expresses because she couldn't talk him out of it? Have you ever felt the anguish of not being able to do anything about it?


Have you ever seen the inexpressible pain and anger of a mother who's son lost his legs? Knowing that he's fighting a war that should already be over? Knowing that his life will forever be changed and will forever be a challenge. Challenges that he shouldn't have to face. Will he ever experience life the way he deserves? 


Have you ever felt that kind of guilt?


Do you know what it feels like to keep something buried and not being able to talk about it to the people you love? The people that accept you with all your flaws. The people you should be able to talk to about anything. But you can't, because deep down you wonder, if they knew, would they still feel the same way?


Maybe if people understood the basic concept of such a vast and all encompassing guilt they wouldn't be so quick to judge. They wouldn't be so quick to ask or accuse. Maybe if they understood that kind of guilt they wouldn't send people to do the things that cause it. Maybe...


Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night
by Dylan Thomas


Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.


Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning that they
Do not go gentle into that good night.


Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.


Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.


Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.


And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Water Torture and Foreign Policy

DISCLAIMER: My normal disclaimer applies. If you're easily offended by the more colorful side of language be warned that I "color" outside the lines rather dramatically. If you're offended by religious comment, political ranting, creative insulting, wake up with your panties in a bunch, or get wrapped up in language instead of looking at the point you may want to stop now. Additionally, this is the opinion of the author and ONLY the author. It does NOT represent the Marine Corps, Department of the Navy, Department of Defense, the U.S. Government or any other official statement. It is simply the opinion of a fairly disgruntled author.


Prior to reading my rant I need you to read two articles:


John McCain hits GOP Hopefuls Over Waterboarding


GOP Field Unveils Disturbing Foreign Policy Platforms

Did you read them? Are you disgusted? Is your mind blown? 


WTF?!?!?! What the fucking fuck is wrong with these people? 


Read this: 
UN Convention Against Torture and other Cruel, Inhuman, or Degrading Treatment of Punishment

Let me point out the most important part of that one, simply: "Torture means any act by which severe pain or suffering, whether physical or mental, is intentionally inflicted on a person for such purposes as obtaining from him or a third person information or a confession, punishing him for an act he or a third person has committed or is suspected of having committed, or intimidating or coercing him or a third person, or for any reason based on discrimination of any kind, when such pain or suffering is inflicted by or at the instigation of or with the consent or acquiescence of a public official or other person acting in an official capacity."


I also want to point out that on the bottom of this document it doesn't state when the U.S. signed this document, we did though, on April 18, 1988. So by international fucking law that we signed we are fucking obligated NOT to torture.


Now allow me to explain what these candidates are referring to as "Waterboarding". Before I do that this is what waterboarding AKA Chinese water torture really is. It's when you strap someone down and repetitively drop a single drop of water on their head. The victim cannot move out of the way and this elicits a physiological response due to the psychological distress of the situation. Thanks to Mythbusters you can watch that shit HERE. After watching that if you don't think it's torture I challenge you to do it in a controlled environment just like in the video and see how the fuck you feel. 


Now the waterboarding that the candidates are referring to is actual water torture, not the Chinese derivative but true unadulterated water torture. This is where they strap a person to a board rigged up like a see-saw with say a bath tub at one end. They then lift the persons feet up forcing the head under the water and hold them there until they're basically seizing in their constraints and push the feet down to bring the head out of the water just before actual drowning commences. This is referred to as simulated drowning. You can also achieve this effect by strapping a person down putting their head in a C-collar which is attached to the board and pouring MASS QUANTITIES of water over their face so they can't fucking breathe. Either way the reaction is the body thinks it's drowning and it causes fucking psychological and physiological havoc on the individual. Referring to our UN definition which the U.S. agreed with by signature how is the fuck is that NOT torture?


This method is NOT an "enhanced interrogation technique", it IS torture. If you want to see an excellent example of an enhance interrogation technique watch Criminal Minds Season 2 Episode 10. Yes, I know it's Hollywood but it is a great example. Gideon pulled a Jedi Mind Fuck on this guy by using media as well as his lack of perception of time and found out what was going to happen. This technique takes a lot of work and practice and can be extremely effective. However, it does not produce instant results. It takes time. Water torture will have the Pope swearing he's fucking Jewish in a day. Yeah, it's effective, but you aren't going to get anything worth while out of it.


If you support these Candidates, which by most articles is all of them except Ron Paul and Jon Huntsman, you are supporting TORTURE. So you may want to rethink your position.


The bottom line is this. The United States is supposed to set an example for the world. We are supposed to adhere to the laws that we uphold and enforce to the rest of the world. If we reinstate these ILLEGAL practices then we are no better than the people we are punishing for the same thing. This is not a case of "Do as I say, not as I do". This is a case of set the example for others to emulate which is a key point of leadership.


Let's move on to some of their other foreign policy platforms shall we?


China. According to several of these candidates they basically want to rake China over the coals. Think about that for just a second. China owns a gratuitous amount of our national debt. So if we take an extremely hard line on China who is to say that they won't raise the interest rates on said debt? Raise those interest rates too much and we may default on our loans. Anyone paying attention to what's happening in Greece right now and Europe as a whole? People, this could catastrophically affect our economy. You think it's bad now? Holy shit, just imagine if our economy collapsed because of our foreign policy towards China. This is not how we should do business. This China thing is a mess that we got ourselves into and restricts our ability to deal with them to an extent. Basically, we made the bed and now we have to lay in it. When it comes to China, we have to think about the repercussions of our economy. I'm not even going to go into the trade issues and supply and demand scenario's that could blow up either. Just think about where most of our debt is. Seriously.


National Security. Along the lines of the torture issue many republicans think Obama has been weak on National Security. Now keep in mind, I'm not an Obamamaniac. I never drank the Kool-Aid and I'm really hard pressed to be impressed with the majority of his Presidency because I think he's spineless when it comes to dealing with Congress. I digress. Obama has had some success in this venture. Under his leadership we found and killed Osama bin Laden. We've taken out key leaders of terrorist groups. Drone strikes have increased dramatically (although I think that's bad for business). There are numerous things he's done that have increased our National Security so I can't agree with their assessment that he is "weak" in this area. With that being said, he has also violated international law and national laws for that matter. Killing Osama, oops, we kinda said fuck you to Pakistan's national sovereignty. Illegal. Drone strikes in areas that we haven't declared war on. Illegal. Remember that American citizen who was abroad supporting Jihad against America? Obama authorized his assassination without any sort of due process. This is illegal both internationally and nationally. Oops. However, these were risks that he was willing to take in the name of "National Security". Riddle me this. If these candidates think that this is a weak stance on National Security, what do they plan on doing if they are elected? Really? Fucking digest the question. That, my loyal readers, scares the ever living shit out of me. 


Ron Paul's Stance: America did this to Itself. I have news for you. He is absolutely, 100%, undeniably correct in his statements. I have said this numerous times myself. Our past foreign policies have pissed people off. You can only push people so far before they retaliate. And they DID. Please take the time before the elections to read "Messages to the World: The Statements of Osama bin Laden". This will open your eyes to how our foreign policy affects others. It will also open your eyes to where this Jihadist movement came from and what it's goals are. Taking down America by any means possible includes our economic stability. Look what's happened with two major wars going on at the same time. The money that has been spent on unnecessary military action. The fact that we put ourselves in a position to be attacked. Since 2003 we have not taken the fight to the enemy, we took the target to the terrorist. 


The big one: Iran and Nuclear Weapons. The answer is not bombing. We cannot afford another war. We cannot control every aspect of every country. We should partner with the United Nations and work diplomatically. Will it keep Iran from developing a nuclear weapon? It may, it may not. However, sometimes you have accept that you can't stop everything that you don't like. I don't want to see Iran with a nuke, but if it happens we adjust and get them on board with the international treaties. I worry about the proliferation of nuclear weapons because Iran supports Hezbollah and Hamas. The thing you have to remember is what happens to Iran if they use a Nuclear Weapon in any way, shape, or form? There is a good chance the rest of the world will retaliate. There is a chance that Iran will cease to exist if this happens. They know and understand this. Here is the thing you have to consider. The powerhouse in the Middle East is Israel. Since their inception they have been running around the Middle East basically unchecked. They also have Nuclear Weapons. So from Iran's stand point if they also have Nuclear Weapons they could potentially put Israel in check and gain a better position for Lebanon and Palestinians. This isn't rocket science nor is it nuclear science. It's world politics and having a nuclear weapon is an equalizer in many countries eyes. Look at the cold war. The U.S. and the USSR both had nuclear weapons and neither one used them because of the ramifications of doing so. Look at India and Pakistan, they have nukes and it controls the extent of their actions. Iranian leadership may be a little crazy at times but these guys aren't complete idiots. They know if they do become a nuclear power that they've gained some leverage on the world stage but if they literally use that leverage then they'll get hammered. The thing is, beyond the threat of nuclear proliferation many politicians view this as a threat to how well we can influence Middle Eastern affairs. If you're gang in the neighborhood is the only one with guns you'll run the neighborhood. If a rival gang obtains guns, well, the balance of power changes. It is literally as simple as that. But bombing the crap out of Iran won't fix the problem, it'll make it worse.


These are all just my thoughts and opinions. You can agree or disagree with any or all of them. However, as we go through primaries and come up to elections these are extremely important topics that you have to pay attention to and consider. The wrong choice could have catastrophic consequences for our country.


The Senator

A Warrior's Prayer...

This one really doesn't require a disclaimer but more of an explanation. Over the past several days with the Marine Corps birthday and Veterans Day I've been tossing around the idea of throwing this out there. Well, after hearing some thoughts from a few friends and talking to my better half I've decided to go ahead and toss this one out there.


The poem you are about to read is a 15 year old's interpretation of the stories he was told by his grandfathers who fought in WWII. One fought for the Army and landed in the fourth wave on Normandy. The other fought for the Marine Corps and landed on numerous islands in the Pacific, to include, Iwo Jima, Okinawa, Saipan, Tarawa, and a few others that I'd have to look at his discharge papers to remember. Keep in mind this is my interpretation, so without further adieu...


A Warrior's Prayer     12-6-95


Lord, please hear me pray,
As I tread along these bloody banks.
Save me from this dying day,
Guide us through descending ranks.


Lord, hear these words I say,
As I walk this blood filled shore.
With fellow man I only pray,
Hoping that my soul will soar.


Lord, look down upon my face,
As I wade knee deep in blood.
Pleading for forgiveness my grace,
I stand within a raging flood.


Lord, save me from this wretched hell,
As I surge towards eternal sleep.
The horrors I've seen I couldn't tell,
Please halt the time so I may weep.


Lord, pull me from enraging flames,
Allow me to sing where angels fly.
Lord, as I pray, my soul he maims,
Please, my Savior, don't let me die...


Cory Will


I hope you enjoyed. I just want to point something out. I wrote this when I was 15. It means so much more to me now. So yeah... as I said, hope you enjoyed.

The Marine Corps Birthday and Veteran's Day

Disclaimer: The author of this blog has few natural talents. However, the most prominent of his talents is the ability to offend even the most unoffendable person (fuck you, it's a word in my world). With that being said the following post may upset your sensibilities. Therefore please heed the following. If you do not appreciate the semi-god like versatility of the word "fuck", if you cannot stand the word "cunt" (with or without quotations), if political views gets your blood boiling, if you are offended by religion bashing of any kind, if you wake up in the morning with your panties in a bunch, if you don't want your repertoire of insults expanded, or if you are not open to controversial opinions you may want to stop now. Also, it is highly advised that if you are under the age of 18 that you have your parents consent to read my ramblings and be exposed to my insanity. If you feel you can handle the rants and ravings of a disgruntled soul please read on, enjoy, and pass on. But don't say I didn't warn you. The following is the opinion of the author, and ONLY the author.

As promised I'm doing a little blog about the Marine Corps' 236th Birthday and I figured I'd throw in the Veterans Day shit as well. Let's start with the Marine Corps thing.

"The wonderful love of a beautiful maid,

The love of a staunch true man,

The love of a baby, unafraid,

Have existed since time began.

But the greatest of loves,

The quintessence of loves.

Even greater than that of a mother,

Is the tender, passionate, infinite love,

Of one drunken Marine for another.

Semper Fidelis"

General Louis H. Wilson 1978

That quote means a lot. It says a lot. Marines are a very peculiar breed of individuals. We make up the smallest branch of the military and provide over 30% of the Nations ground combat power on only 8% of the Defense budget. That is a lot of bang for your buck. Because of that we endure greater hardship than most military members and we signed up with the understanding that our lives, for however long we stayed on Active Duty, would not be easy. Our boot camp is the longest of any service, it's grueling, and it is the only one that is still segregates men and women. Following that, each Marine, man and woman, is trained as a basic rifleman. Most of us infantry consider the "Marine Combat Training" POG's (Person Other-than Grunt) go through an absolute joke. However, they are getting basic training for combat operations and to understand simple tactics as well as weapons use which is much better than the other services. This post isn't about POG bashing though, even though that is one of my favorite past times. It's about the Marine Corps in general. I really want to point something out to the people not in the Marine Corps loop.

The Marine Corps is an amphibious fighting force. We're "America's 911". We are designed and equipped to respond to incidents world wide in less than 72 hours. We float around on ship's while the Navy gets pissed off because we treat that ship like it's ours. Because, well, it is. If it weren't for us there would be no need for it. When the call comes we answer with an enthusiasm rivaled only by Iraqi kids and their cravings for Chocolate. It's important to understand that we don't just kick in doors and blast people into oblivion although that's what we love to do. We respond to Humanitarian Crisis, Evacuations, Recovery of Personnel, Security Missions. You name it and we'll probably do it. We are America's ambassadors to the world. Around the world U.S. Marines are either revered or feared, often times both. We are the tip of the spear in combat. We go anywhere, any time, for any reason that the President deems necessary. We don't need an act of Congress to do our job. We need a phone call to release the dogs of war. Many relate Marines to pure breed dogs like the English Bulldog, the Doberman, the Rottweiler, or the infamous Devil Dog of German lore. We are none of these. Marines are that mangled mutt that is a mix of every breed of dog you can thing of. We come from so many backgrounds that it's impossible to list. But we all share one thing in common. We're that mutt that guards your home with a ferocity that cannot be rivaled. 

"I have three new heroes now. They are...

New York's bravest, the fire fighters,

New York's finest, the cops,

and the United States Marine Corps.

Because, as you know, before this thing is finished, it will be the Marine Corps that goes in and settles the score."

David Letterman 9-18-01

Let me touch on that just a little. The Marines are not meant to be an Army. The mission we have been serving in Afghanistan and Iraq is the mission of the U.S. Army. However, for some reason the Army can't handle it. So, send in the Marines. It's worked throughout history and it works now. In Afghanistan they sent us in to the most remote and desolate places to fuck shit up and settle shit down. When we were done, they sent in the Army. The Army immediately got fucked up. In Iraq they put us in Baghdad. We had that place on fucking lock down like a priest protecting his little boy toy. Then Al Anbar province, which was under Army control, went bat shit crazy. So again, send in the Marines. We squashed that shit quick as fuck. We ran those fuckers straight up the Euphrates from Baghdad to the Syrian border. The ones who made it out alive did so by pure luck. Let me explain tactics as I witnessed them in Iraq. If an Army convoy was attacked they opened fire in all directions and pushed through without stopping. This tactic resulted in the deaths of countless innocent civilians who just happened to be in the area. This tactic kicked our "Winning the hearts and minds" counter-insurgency mission right in the dick. The Marines were left to clean up this fucking mess, and we did. When a Marine convoy was attacked the response was something along the lines of a woman in the ghetto who just had some hoodlum call her a whore, "OH NO YOU DIDN'T JUST DO THAT SHIT." If we were attacked we stopped, got the fuck outta the trucks, and went after those fuckers with everything we had. We hunted them down like it was our last fucking meal at stake. This tactic was amazingly effective. We did this shit in Afghanistan too. In Afghan we were relieved by an Army unit, the 10th Mountain Division. They had triple our man power. Unfortunately, they were getting fucked up so bad because the enemy saw them in green uniforms and knew they weren't Marines cause we wore brown. So they attacked them instead of us. If we were with them, they let the sleeping dogs lie. They knew that if they attacked the Marines they were opening a can of whoop ass on themselves. 

It's this kind of fighting spirit that differentiates Marines from any other service. Something I've said continually that few people outside the Corps understand is that we fight for each other. It's not about our country at that point. It's not about some obscure intangible quality like patriotism. It's not about the "reasons" behind the war. Although many of those may be the inspiration behind the individual becoming a Marine, but that isn't why we fight. We fight for each other. We fight for our brothers. We fight for their lives. We normally disregard our own safety for the chance to save our brothers souls. We go into combat with the expectation of not coming home. We are dead men walking and you can't take anything away from someone who already considers themselves dead. With this understanding let me move onto my current feelings about Veterans Day, because frankly I'm torn and kind of disgruntled.

Veterans Day is about thanks for those who served this nation. Those who served in peace or war. Those who gave the ultimate sacrifice and those who continue to sacrifice. What has me disgruntled is not the outpouring of "Thank You's" that I've been receiving but of the actions of some of my fellow Veterans. I'm going to put it like this. If you are a veteran and you continually brag about what you did, go fuck yourself. The people that do this normally haven't done shit. Now, let me say that I'm not referring to the many people I know who only served in times of peace. They stood up and signed that check to the U.S. government and it was never cashed. They did their duty and served honorably. I'm talking about those veterans who have served in the Global War on Terrorism. You know, the ones who talk about being in combat all the fucking time and the crazy shit they did even though they aren't from the combat arms side. Many of you may not recognize this because you haven't served. Many people that are like that never actually saw combat. These people were in the rear with the gear doing support role work. Yes, we need them. I need someone making sure that I'm getting my beans, bullets, and band aids. I need someone making sure my Marines are getting paid. I need someone refueling the planes and helicopters. I need that shit. What I don't need is these fuckers coming back home and telling people their glorious war stories about the one time they were outside the wire and found an IED or some stupid shit. That's if they ever left the wire. I also don't need people blowing shit out of proportion. By the way, if you ever hear someone say shit like "I still can't talk about this cause it's classified", that means they are totally full of fucking shit and are lying to your face. They people that actually work those classified missions won't even bring that shit up. The ones who talk about it non stop, are probably also full of shit. There are very few people who talk about it to people outside their circles. Some of us choose to talk about certain aspects so people understand us. I bring up a little bit and so does a friend and former Marine, Garrett Phillip Anderson. Here is his blog, go read it, he speaks the truth in a gut wrenching, heart breaking kind of way: http://garrett-anderson.blogspot.com/ . It's worth the read. You have to realize that some of us choose to write like this and expose ourselves to others because we want more people to understand the reality of war, service, and sacrifice. 

This is another reason I'm pissed off today. Our government isn't doing nearly enough for our Vets. Too many are jobless, homeless, hopeless. Too many are taking their lives. Too many are suffering needlessly because the VA is fucking broken. So for you, my faithful reader, I ask that on this Veterans day rather than giving thanks or some random act of kindness like buying a vet coffee, to please write your Congressman and Senators expressing your outrage on the VA systematic failure, the slashing of Military benefits, and the overall treatment of veterans in general. Actions speak louder than words. The thank you's are nice but so much more needs to be done.

And with that, I'm out for the moment.

Occupation Movement

Many of you have been patiently waiting for my thoughts on the Occupy (place here) Movement and there are some of you that have been a little less patient. So I figure I've been mulling over this for quite some time so I shall bestow my humble thoughts on the innerwebz masses.

DISCLAIMER:

Yes the normal disclaimer applies because I have this great knack for offending even the unoffendable (I know it's not a word, bite me). Alas the most important portion of this particular disclaimer is this. This blog represents the opinion of the author and only the author. That means the guy typing right now. It does NOT represent the opinion of the Marine Corps, the Navy, the Department of Defense, the U.S. Government or any affiliates there of. It also does not represent any type of official statement nor does it represent any other aspect of the U.S. Government that could Court Martial the author under the Uniformed Code of Military Justice. This is exceptionally important to understand. This is my opinion and ONLY my opinion, no one else's, just mine.

Ok, so where exactly to begin. The initial movement was to Occupy Wall Street in NYC to express grievances about corporations basically running many aspects of government and in many cases figuratively getting away with murder against the American people. Basically the big corporations barely pay taxes and get HUGE tax returns each year courtesy of the tax payer. In addition politicians are giving them more tax breaks in order to ensure they have excess money to hire more Americans. In theory this makes sense, however, this is not what happens. Most of these corporations have been closing shop in the U.S. and outsourcing overseas because it's cheaper to operate there and they can make more profit. Meanwhile they are still taking all the tax incentives and are essentially screwing the American people. This as I understand it was the original grievance that was being protested. Not to mention that the "occupation" was supposed to be hundreds or thousands of people milling around the area basically making it an annoyance while the big wigs went to and from work. It made sense, it wasn't just peaceful assembly, it was peaceful annoyance. I thought this approach was fucking brilliant. Then something happened that no one really expected...

This movement to Occupy Wall Street fucking EXPLODED. More and more people came out and when they couldn't make it to New York City they started doing the shit in their own cities at the corporate centers or government centers. Now things got interesting because the original message was something along the lines of what the corporations are doing isn't fair but there was no official agenda. So yeah, initially, there wasn't an official message. The official message and the list of demands wasn't put out until a week or so into the movement. Although saying that, they have been organizing this since June but it was about a grievance with no clear list of demands, if that makes sense. Now here is the fun and confusing part about all of this. There are so many different groups taking part in this that there are at least 10 different lists of demands. Unfortunately I can't seem to find the one that was originally posted on the OWS site. 

So here we are nearly two months deep into the movement to Occupy and it has gone from National to Worldwide. Yet some things have gone horribly wrong. First and foremost there is no leadership, they are in their own words a "leaderless resistance". Just wanna point something out here, in order to get anything done in this country you have to have a leader to address the people that make changes, you know those Congressional people. Secondly, protesters are breaking laws. Yes, we have the right to PEACEFULLY assemble. However, in many states and cities you have to have a permit to protest. This is because they put extra police on shift, will block traffic, etc in the name of protecting the protesters. This has lead to some problems, namely that the protesters may not have the right permits and now the cops are being told to remove them and BOOM. All fucking hell breaks loose. Thirdly, the police are over reacting. For fucking real. Regardless of whether or not the protesters are listening to the cops the cops do not have the right to use excessive force. PERIOD. You can't do that shit, it's bad for business. And what pisses me off most about this is during the "Arab Spring" our government told these Arab governments they should not be attacking the protesters. Yet now it is happening in our own fucking country and the politicians are looking the other fucking way. This is bullshit. Lastly our fellow Americans aren't looking at this the right way. I read posts from people saying that "OWS is stupid, they need to get a job etc." Then their next post is bitching about the government or something the big banks are doing and I just want to reach through the screen and slap them up side the head with a mug full of wake the fuck up because that is ONE of the things the OWS movement is protesting. 

At this point I will be completely honest about the movement, I don't agree with everything that they are protesting, HOWEVER, I am intelligent and honest enough to admit that there is a lot they are protesting that I do agree with. 

I don't think corporations should get so many tax breaks and I REALLY don't believe they rate a fucking tax refund. Especially when the government, or we the fucking people, give them tax incentives to hire more Americans yet they are closing up offices and outsourcing to save money. "Look, we created jobs here! Just don't look in Ohio where we closed down a plant and moved it to fucking China so the 500 jobs we just created are offset by the 2500 we just got rid of." Don't believe me, search Google.

Corporate Personhood is a load of fucking bullshit. I am a person, a corporation is not. Enough said. I'm not even sure how this is an argument.

Corporations should have to abide by U.S. laws just like the rest of us. Listen, if I got in bed with Iran and made deals with them to make a profit I'm going to jail. No if's, and's, or but's about it. Do not pass go, do not collect $200, go DIRECTLY to jail. Ladies and Gentlemen we have got some big corporations operating in our country that our doing just that. The best part about it is, they are getting away with it. Don't believe me, search Google.

Our politicians should NOT be allowed to take donations from corporations. This is bullshit. Politicians are supposed to be for the people, by the people. HOW THE FUCK IS GOLDMAN SACHS THE FUCKING PEOPLE! They aren't, but damn it they are funneling money to a shit load of politicians. This is bullshit.

Our government should be investing in the infrastructure of this country. This not only creates fucking jobs but it also prevents things like fucking bridges collapsing. But because we have such bipartisan bullshit going on our government can't pass a fucking bowel movement let alone productive legislation.

Here are some things I don't agree with.

100% debt forgiveness. The vast majority of people worked damn hard to get out of debt or keep it minimal. If you didn't, why should you be rewarded while others aren't. I understand there are circumstances but why not ask for a temporary hold on interest charges instead. Makes more sense to me and is more feasible and will help everyone out. The banks still make money so this wouldn't necessarily shut them down either. Contrary to popular belief complete debt forgiveness will fuck the banks. However, granting temporary  interest relief will not, just stand by for a charge every fucking time you use your debit card cause they will find another way to make money off of you. Don't like it? Use cash.

Student Loan Forgiveness. Again, you took out the loan to get your education. You chose the school. You chose what to major in. It was your choice. Yes we need higher education in this day and age but for the love of fuck there are ways to do it without going into debt up to your eyeballs. 

There is more on the agree and disagree but that could take a while, those are the main ones.

With this movement there is something that is absolutely amazing happening that I think few people have considered. 


So a friend of mine posted something along the lines of an Egyptian saying that all the Occupy stuff looks like Tahrir Square in the spring. He then went on about how disgusting it made him feel because the U.S. is supposed to be better than that. I pondered this for a while and it sort of hit me like a lemon wrapped gold brick how fucking amazingly awesome that actually is. Let me explain. We are supposed to be a democracy that others want to emulate. We are supposed to show the world that people can have a say in government. Yet throughout the world countries have looked upon us as bullies because of our foreign policies and especially our actions over the past ten years. Now they are looking at us and saying, "HOLY FUCK ME RUNNING BACKWARDS BATMAN, if the Americans can do this, so CAN WE!" And now they are standing up next to us the world over. Call it revolution, call it anarchy, call it whatever the fuck you want to, I call it a beautiful thing that people are looking past cultural differences, past race, past nationality, past religion, and past every other biased boundary out there to stand up as one and say in one voice, "We think this is fucked up and you need to fucking fix it." How is that not amazing? How does that not take your breath away and bring a tear to your eye? The people the world over are speaking in one voice. 


People in the Middle Fucking East are identifying with people of the West without bias of any kind. Think about that just for a second. Well take a few days and really digest that concept. Really turn it over in your head. Then think, many of these people were the same ones who celebrated on 9/11/01 because the U.S. was supporting ruthless regimes and their foreign policies were not helping the people in their country because of U.S. interests. Now, these same people as well as their sons and daughters, have stood up the world over and joined out voice. How is that not fucking brilliant? You want to end terrorism, guess what, this may be a larger blow to terrorism than anything any country the world over could have done. Now there is a common understanding about grievances. They identify with us and with that there is a sort of mutual understanding. With that, there is less of a reason to promote or support terrorism throughout the world. 


"For he today who sheds his blood with me shall be my brother."
~Shakespeare - Henry V


That quote says it all. It's not combat, it's in protest, it's figurative but it's equally as powerful. 


We speak of United Nations, but this is something different. It is a united people against corruption in its purest form. In the words of Sean Penn, "It's people saying they will no longer live in fear." It's amazing. 


Even if you don't agree with everything they say you have to admit the unity of it is amazing. You also must remember that there are so many individuals and groups involved and they all want different things. In the end they are all saying that the system is broken and we need to fix it.


Here's what I think they should do to be even more effective and really institute change.


1) Demand that all protests are being conducted within the law and that all protesters truly peacefully assemble.


2) Form a leadership committee with a representative in each city in order to spearhead talks with local, state, and federal politicians.


3) Form a no bullshit political party for the 2012 elections. There is still time. Not to mention look at the outpouring support from the American people who would support this.


4) Develop a list of grievances that includes all parties to make it crystal clear what everyone is pissed off about. Make this the ONE official list of grievances.


5) Develop a list of solutions to these grievances that all parties agree on. Make this the One official list of "demands".


6) Begin to campaign for 2012. The best way to change things in this country is not to influence politicians but to replace them. 


Ladies and Gentlemen these are the things I can see that will help make the changes that the Occupation Movement wants. As much as I respect how the leaderless resistance took the world by storm, if we want anything done, we have to stand up and do it. We definitely can't depend on others to do it for us, look where that's gotten us.


Ok, so that's my lot. Again this is just MY opinion. You can choose to agree or disagree but this is what I think about it.


Via con Ocupacion!!!


The Senator

That Nagging Feeling

So yeah the normal disclaimer remains in effect I'm not going to gloss over it, I just need to get down to business. I just feel this need to write, metaphorically speaking of course because I'm actually typing... if this was the written word from me most of you would be trying to figure out if you were reading a blog or attempting to learn Sanskrit, I digress.


That nagging feeling has been forcing its way into my thoughts again. That nagging feeling that I shouldn't be here, that I should be deployed. That feeling that no matter what I could do more there than I can here. It's the most aggravating feeling in the world. It's driving me nuts. For those of you who haven't been paying attention, one of the Marines I worked with in Guard Company (the Bastard child of Marine Barracks Washington) is laid up in Bethesda, sedated, intubated, and undergoing constant surgeries after surviving an IED blast that took his legs. And there's that feeling that had I been there, he'd be out walking patrols and not lying in a bed fighting for his future. I know it doesn't make sense, but it is what it is. 


It's weird though because we spent some time with his family tonight and I was humbled by their strength and resilience. Just blown away. There is something that stuck out though. I mean the conversation about war was skirted around the entire evening. We talked politics, green energy, global warming, stories of their son and the antics he used to pull, but then, then we hit something when we discussed war. Because their questions, like many others, including my own, was, "Why are we still there? What's it all for? What are we trying to accomplish? What did he lose his legs for?" There it is. 


The fucked up thing is I agree with them yet I still want to go back. I just don't understand what's going on in my own fucking head. It just doesn't make any fucking sense. I've been screaming about getting the fuck out of Afghanistan for a good minute now but I want to go back. It's crazy. We do good things over there that are never put on the news here because good news doesn't sell. That's bullshit in and of itself. But even with doing all this good shit the people we are fighting are trying to maim us and not necessarily kill us. Fuck burying someone, make them suffer through something horrendous. Yet we're still fucking there and I still want to go back.... no sense.


Now don't get me wrong, I completely agree with the other 99% throughout the world that are currently protesting in more places than I can remember. I agree that corporations have gotten away with a lot of fucked up shit and should be held accountable just like the rest of us. I agree with the basic grievance that they are protesting. Now their demands, half of those are bat shit crazy and don't stand in line with what they are protesting. But this isn't a discussion about their demands. This is something different. Why is it that in Vietnam millions protested against the war, but in 2011 they are protesting the corporations? Can someone explain that to me please? Do these people not realize that if we stopped the war our country would be a hell of a lot better off than it is now? This is our first problem that needs to be fixed. As much as I want to go back, it needs to end. And it needs to end, not soon, but NOW. Once we stop spending billions upon billions of dollars on wars that we no longer need to fight, then we should address the shit corporations have gotten away with for so long. 


Will someone please explain to me why protesting the war hasn't taken a priority? Not the troops, the war. It's not unpatriotic to tell our government we need to stop this war. It's just not. Protesting the troops is an entirely different thing. I think that's disgraceful considering the people that are running the government are the reason we're still fucking there. Protest those bitches. Protest the war. Stand up to Washington and say, "HEY, we need to stop this NOW." 


I just don't get it. We're still there and we shouldn't be but all I want to do is go back. 


Fuck.

For LCpl Mark I. Fidler... Please Share as much as possible. UPDATED!

UPDATE: As of November 28, 2011 LCpl Mark Fidler received a personal letter from Former President G.W. Bush. Unfortunately due to Presidential protocols President Bush cannot visit Mark at this time. However, he took the time out to send Mark a letter which is great in my opinion. For all of those who helped by sending their own letter I want to offer my heart felt thanks with this. I am still going to leave the original letter posted on here as well as the letter posted by the family below. Thanks again for what all of you did!

Sincerely,

Me

The Honorable George W. Bush

P.O. Box 259000

Dallas, TX 75225-9000

October 13, 2011

Dear President G. W. Bush,

                My name is Gunnery Sergeant Cory D. Will with the United States Marine Corps. During your tenure as Commander-In-Chief I served multiple combat tours in Afghanistan and Iraq as an Infantry Unit Leader. Today I write to you on behalf of Lance Corporal Mark I. Fidler and his family.

                On Monday October 3^rd of this year Mark was struck by an IED on a dismounted patrol in Helmand Province, Afghanistan. The injuries received have been so severe that in order to save his life Mark has had both of his legs amputated up to the hip. As of today he still has multiple major surgeries that will be completed over the upcoming weeks but he will survive this tragedy.

                I spoke with his family today and his father, Kerm Fidler, told me about President Obama’s visit to see Mark when he arrived at Bethesda Naval Medical Center this past weekend. When he finished telling me about President Obama’s visit he immediately asked if I knew if there was any way we could request to have President Bush visit Mark in a few weeks when Mark is not so heavily sedated. After looking around on the internet I found this address and immediately began composing this letter.

                Sir, the Fidler’s have been staunch supporters of you since you first took office in 2000. Both Mr. and Mrs. Fidler’s sons joined the Marine Corps in answer to your calls to service to eliminate the terrorist threat overseas. Both sons have also served in combat. Now one of them lies in a hospital bed in Bethesda Maryland missing both of his legs. I know Mark very well and he will get through this and he will be proud of what he has done as a Marine in the Infantry. He will never regret his decision to serve or go to combat. Through all of this his family has made the simple request that you come visit their son while he is in the hospital.

                On October 11^th of this year I read an article stating that what you missed most about your Presidency was interaction with the troops. You said, “There’s nothing as courageous in my judgment as someone who had a leg blown off in combat overcoming the difficulties.” Sir, your visit will help inspire this young Marine to meet and overcome the challenges he will face after losing both of his legs. As a Marine Gunnery Sergeant with 14 years of active service and multiple combat tours I am humbly requesting that you come to Bethesda Maryland to visit Lance Corporal Mark I. Fidler who has paid a great sacrifice serving during the Global War on Terror.

                Thank you for your time and your consideration in this matter.

Respectfully submitted,

Cory D. Will

Gunnery Sergeant    United States Marine Corps

World of War-On-Terrorcraft by D. James Davis

Ok people so the most glorious writer Dan Davis sent me this little tidbit of awesomeness last night. Alas I did not read it until this morning because I was in a drug induced pass out period because of the roughness of the past few days. BTW the Ambien/Prozasin/Octoberfest cocktail I took last night worked pretty damn well, but I digress. This is by far the best comparison that I have read concerning warfare. If you are a video game junkie you will appreciate this on an enormous level and if you aren't you'll still understand and relate to the vast majority of it.

So before you get to the meat and potatoes I want you to take the time to book mark his website and then take a read through it when you get a chance. I HIGHLY recommend reading The Diary of a Lazy Hero because it's fucking EPIC. Anyways here's his site:

D. James Davis

Also since I'm all about pimping take a second to vote for his short quip on the Facebook Reader's Digest Competition.

Toying with the Psychiatrist

Without further adieu I present the awesomeness of D. James Davis...

WORLD OF WAR-ON-TERRORCRAFT: Explaining America’s Long War in Video Game Terms

By D. James Davis

Over the years, a lot of people have asked me to talk about the war. Not what it was like. They don’t want to know about the mud and the blood and the horrible things. And it’s just as well. I wouldn’t tell them, anyway. People with a finer gift for words than I’ll ever have have written plenty on the subject. I’d tell people to read them instead.

No, what people want to hear from me is the “Big Picture,” foreign policy stuff: Should we be there? Can we win? What are we even fighting for, and when do you think it’ll be over?

And as anyone who’s ever asked me these questions can tell you, I usually don’t say much. There’s a reason for that. It’s not that I don’t have an opinion. It’s that I can’t divorce that opinion from all the stuff I don’t want to talk about: The mud and the blood and the horror.

You see, if I say something they don’t agree with, there’ll be a debate. And it’s a debate I don’t want. They’ll be debating politics and abstract concepts, while I’ll be debating memories that keep me from ever sleeping soundly. No matter what happens next, I’ll leave the situation much worse for wear, and much more upset. So I generally just stay quiet. And besides, people are going to think whatever the hell they want to, anyway.

But today I feel the need to say something. And it has nothing to do with seeing a commentator on CNN, or an Op-ed piece on MSN. It has nothing to do with any of the political, big picture stuff. It’s because of the blood and the mud and the horrible stuff.

Very recently, a friend of mine named Cory wrote something. Cory is one of those people I told you about, with a finer gift for words than I’ll ever have. He wrote about what he was feeling after a young Marine of his came home a double amputee. Cory speaks volumes about the anguish we all feel when one of our brothers comes home less than whole. The anguish we feel at the injustice of it all. And through it all is the same question we’ve all had: Why?

That’s what we want to know. Why did this happen to us? Why are we suffering? Why are we putting our lives on the line?And under that is another question: How much is enough? How much more do I have to suffer before this thing is over?

Well, I have an answer for that. But it isn’t a pretty one.

So without further ado, here it is. My explanation of America’s Global War on Terror. Framed completely within video game references, so as to be easily understood by the twenty-something civilian college demographic.


PART 1: Historical Context -

The majority of America’s past wars were like the early-generation console games. They all had a victory condition: a set of criteria that meant we successfully beat the war.

For example, the American Revolution had the victory condition of securing autonomous government. Failure to meet this condition would have meant we didn’t win.

This is analogous to Nintendo’s 1986 classic, “The Legend of Zelda.” In order to win the game, the player needs to rescue Princess Zelda. Failure to meet this criteria means you don’t win.

The American Civil War had the victory condition of regaining control over the secessionist states.

This is similar to the Gameboy versions of “Pokemon,” in which the player’s goal is to “catch ‘em all.”

World War II had a more abstract victory condition, but a victory condition nonetheless: the unconditional surrender of Nazi Germany and Imperial Japan.

This is most analogous to “Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out.” We had to defeat an overwhelmingly superior opponent, and it was only made possible through hard work, dedication, and by dropping the equivalent of the “Game Genie” on Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

In short, they were winnable.


Part 2: The MMORPG model, or “How they convince you to pay $15.99 per month for a game you already own.” -

America’s Global War on Terror, by contrast is more like Blizzard’s “Word of Warcraft.”

We invaded Afghanistan in late 2001. We began attacking terror cells and Taliban strongholds, which is similar to WoW’s “instances” or dungeons. They’re short-term endeavors, and each individual dungeon has a victory condition, like killing a “boss” or cell leader. And, much like the WoW dungeons, you can hit the same one over and over again. It doesn’t seem to make too much difference either way.

But “instances” aside, the overall war effort is like the World of Warcraft game itself. There is no victory condition. You can set yourself a goal as a player. For example, you may really want to beat that 80th-level Osama Bin Laden dungeon. And you may even succeed. But in the end, you still haven’t beaten the game. It’s still there.

You can play forever. You can buy the Iraq and Libya expansion packs. And for a while, that’s new and exciting. You’re so caught up in all the new dungeons that you don’t notice it’s still the same game. And you’ll just keep playing, until you get tired of wasting your life and your money on it, and move onto something else.

So in sum, the War on Terror will only end when America decides it has better things to do than sit in it’s mom’s basement and obsess over an ultimately un-winnable game.

Shit. Maybe we just need to go out and get laid.

I don't know.... just fucking because.

The disclaimer... yeah fuck that. If you haven't figured it out by now stop munching on fucking lead paint chips and wake the fuck up. This has the potential to offend and that about sums up my fucking disclaimer.

So yeah two blogs in one day, aren't you guys the lucky ones. All I can say is that since my therapist is fucking useless and all she tells me to do is relax and do this relaxing exercise and blah blah blah blah blah blah... yeah fucking useless. Wanna save some money Congress, start doing customer satisfaction survey's on the therapists that are hired for PTSD and shit and I promise you you'll be able to shit can about 90% of them. Then spend some fucking money to educate those who have fucking been there because they have an understanding of what we fucking go through and will probably be able to help other vets a hell of a lot better than my brain team duo who just keeps telling me to stop drinking fucking coffee and to quit smoking. Well here's a thought, if we could figure out why the FUCK I can't sleep I wouldn't need all the fucking coffee and cancer sticks to keep me going... anyways, yeah.

Today I saw a 22 year old kid who went overseas to fight a war we should have ended but he did it for us. What does he get in return? He gets to give up both his legs from the femur down. What the fuck? When is enough enough? How many more friends and loved ones do we have to bury and nurse back to health before someone that works in the general vicinity of Washington DC wakes the fuck up and says, "Wow, this shit ain't working"? How FUCKING many? I'm fucking tired of it. Twenty-fucking-two years old. He's a fucking baby and now he has to tackle life in an entirely different way. I know the kid and I know he's gonna do it with a smile on his face and his middle finger in the air. I know if he ever wanted to ride a motorcycle he'll have a pimped out Harley trike with a suicide shifter and fucking gun rack on the back, but that's not really the point. This shit just shouldn't have to happen anymore. It's fucking done. We killed bin Laden, we killed all these higher ups, we've killed so many fucking people that we're the equivalent of the plague that wiped out a 1/3 of Europe back in the day. Yet we still keep sending our boys to war, to fight an ideology. Haven't we learned from history? You can't wage war against a fucking concept. It's just not fucking possible. 

"Oh but we're fighting a war against terrorism." Are you fucking stupid. Terrorism is a fucking tactic. A TACTIC according to Webster's is 1) a device for accomplishing an end, 2) a method of employing forces in combat. You can't fight that, that's fucking retarded. As long as one country has greater military forces an adversary will use whatever "Tactic" will be most successful. Hey fucktards, pick up a fucking history book. The English referred to our tactics in the Revolutionary War as ungentlemanly and terrorism. Why? Because we couldn't go toe to toe with the red coats, they were too well trained, too powerful, too well equipped. So we handed a hunter or farmer a gun, told him to hide in a tree, and take them out one by one. Why did we do that? Because it was the most feasible tactic we could employ to win. The thing is we fought for something then. It wasn't about national interest, it was about self-governance. We wanted our country (which we stole from someone else) to be ours. We wanted a say it what went on here, and we used every fucking tactic possible to bring that want, that need, that desire to a reality. 

About 60 years ago we began a campaign of "containment". We wanted to contain the spread of communism. How fucking noble of us. All the sudden we started fighting against a system, an ideological concept. We were fighting against communists. Ok so we kept them from taking over South Korea. Then we decided that we would do the same thing in Vietnam. That was a little different because we tried to stay within the borders of one country, only problem is our enemy didn't. They used whatever tactic would work. In Korea they couldn't really go outside of the one country because the water was TOO FUCKING COLD. In Vietnam, fuck it right, a jungle is a jungle, only they American's won't go past this imaginary line but we will. So now, we're fighting against an ideology and we're trying to fight a tactic that was developed to knock out conventional armies, insurgency. So what happened with Vietnam... we wasted tens of thousands of lives and destroyed a hundred thousand more. For what? What the fuck did we accomplish? The Soviet Union ended up collapsing not because of what we did directly but because they kept trying to spread their views in places that it wasn't wanted... namely Afghanistan. Holy shit, sound familiar. 

So here we are, now over ten years in the same country and we're still fighting but we've long forgotten what for. We've killed the bad guys, we've weakened the terrorist network, we've established better international cooperation to catch people before they have an opportunity to strike. Yet we are still fighting. I'm still seeing more friends buried in Arlington, I'm still seeing more friends being shipped to the states missing arms, legs, and worse. For what? Will someone please fucking explain to me why the fuck we're still fighting?

Twenty fucking somethings are getting killed and maimed at the fucking sustained rate and we just keep throwing them into it. What the fuck. Seriously, when are they going to learn? Does anyone else remember when a man took the office of President under the promise that he was going to see an end to this war? I remember that. And I can't help but wonder why I've had to watch so many be laid to rest and why like today, on Thursday I'll be at a hospital to support a friend and his family during a really hard time in their lives. It's supposed to be over...

"Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired, signifies in the final sense a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed.

~Dwight D. Eisenhower 

Marine Corps Stuff...

So for those of you who loyally read my rants and raves let me start off with my normal disclaimer. To sum it up quickly if you're easily offended by colorful language, political commentary, religion bashing (that's what someone e-mailed me), sarcasm, etc. Please spare yourself the pain and hit the back button. This is the internet and therefore I have the privilege (notice I didn't say "right") to post whatever the hell I want. Additionally since I'm going to be talking about the Marine Corps I have to add that the views and opinions that are reflected in this blog are in no way, shape, or form, the views of the United States Marine Corps, the Department of Defense, the United States Government, or any other official type organization that may have Court Marshaling authority over my dumb ass. I think that covers about everything so off to the races...


Now this one is a little different primarily because even though my unexplained pissed off mood still resides in my little world this is more along the lines of thoughts that I've been musing over recently. For those of you who don't know I've been serving on Active Duty in the Marine Corps as an Infantryman for the past 14 years. Prior to the war breaking out I deployed, since the war broke out I've deployed, and due to a family emergency at the moment I'm non-deployable but still have many friends and Marines whom I've served with who are actively deploying. 


Most of the infantry guys you run across are fairly simple people. Now when I say that I don't mean the typical stereo type of "Ooh Rah dumb dumb grunt" I mean we have been humbled by what we have seen and by what we have done so we truly enjoy the simple things in life. The weekend BBQ's, the embrace of loved ones, the ice cold beer, the hot shower, a home cooked meal, the simple things that most take for granted. I'd also like to extend the fact that this goes for nearly all the ground combat arms side of the Marine Corps, this includes tankers, trackers, artillery, etc. We all get shit on pretty regularly and get asked to do more than your average Marine who, for example, may be a chair pilot in an administration shop. I'm not saying those other Marines don't serve a purpose because I like getting paid, I like having equipment that works, and having someone in the air above to light up a mountainside is always a good thing. However, their experience in the Corps isn't nearly the same as your average grunt. 


As long as I can remember I've heard the expression "You can't spell disgruntled without the grunt." This saying rings true on so many levels it's not even funny. Your average grunt and ground combat arms guys aren't as motarded (meaning motivated to the point of stupidity) and aren't nearly as happy with our lot in the Corps because we don't get treated quite the same. We get pushed out on some FOB (forward operating base) with little to no amenities and get asked to do a job that is pretty hard at times. That's fine, we accept that. After all that's what we signed up for and few of us will ever ask to do something different for the Corps. Now here is what upsets me. When the big wigs go out to visit the troops they don't go to places where most grunts live and work while deployed. They go to the big bases in the rear that have the DFAC chow halls, the movie theaters, pizza hut, subway, burger king, stores and shops, the hugenormous gyms, etc. Many of the people on these bases even live in small two person apartments with their own internet connection, air conditioning, and sometimes even cable TV. This is a far cry from the FOB I was at in Iraq where I nearly electrocuted myself and was thrown from the 16 foot high roof while trying to alter the ungrounded plumbing system in order to install a fucking washing machine so our Marines could wash their fucking clothes. We're grunts, we improvise, adapt, and overcome in any situation handed to us. However, the problem lies in the fact that those big wigs who come and visit never see that shit. They see troops living the good life at these major installations and think, "These guys have it great." Yeah deployment experiences vary. So what ends up happening is certain things get cut because the troops they saw are living great. When things get cut the people at these major bases rarely suffer. It's usually that Battalion of grunts living in squalor that lose out on various comfort items. Yet we push on, a little more disgruntled than normal, but we push on. 


Most of us aren't heroes, we do what we have to do to get that man to our right and our left home safe. Most of us have little regard for our own lives but guard our fellow Marines lives with a zealous passion that would rival the most dedicated terrorist or insurgent the world over. At our level patriotism is a foreign concept long since abandoned and left at home for those who live in peace and wave a little flag or sport the latest yellow ribbon. Some of us become heroes because of actions in combat or paying the ultimate sacrifice. Those who lay down their lives in order to save another Marine or in many cases civilians caught in a cross fire. Each and everyone of us leaves combat a different person. A part of you changes out there that is impossible to explain to anyone who hasn't experienced it. In a metaphorical way a part of us dies off and is replaced by something entirely different.


Some guys come back with some pretty significant issues, some come back without limbs, with physical scars from battle, and all come back different than when they left. We're all a little bitter at our non-combat arms cohorts who lived a better life and get talked to like their war heroes for even though they weren't exposed to the same things as the combat arms lot. Like I said before, we don't view ourselves as heroes and when someone refers to any of us as one we will normally look to the ground in an awkward sort of way because we just don't see it like that. Many of us have skeletons in our closets and demons in our souls from what we had to do and witnessed and the vast majority of us will take those skeletons and demons to our graves.


We attempt to assimilate back into the society we once knew but it's different. We're met by loved ones who think everything will be exactly the same upon our return and we all truly wish it could be. Some of us can't sleep, some of us are plagued with nightmares, some of us are tormented by our minds so much that suicide seems like the most viable option, and some of us shut ourselves out from as much of life as we can. Then some prick on the Hill talks about when he/she visited the troops and how good they have it over there. Then you get pissed off even more. If you're still in the Corps for a while you develop a hatred for non-combat arms people who lived in those nice places and run around talking about it and glorifying themselves and what they did. Meanwhile you don't even talk about it except with  a close group of people who you served with. It's kind of strange. Sometimes you feel like you did the work while others get the credit. Then you just push on and do your thing and ignore the rest.


This past weekend a Marine I was in charge of for a while arrived at Naval Medical Center Bethesda. He's in his early twenty's, from Pennsylvania, he loves to fish, hunt, and do pretty much anything outdoors. He screwed up a bit when he first got in and got into some trouble but no matter what he always had a smile on his face and was quick to crack a joke and laugh. Yet when we found out what happened to him the rest of the world was occupied with Steve Jobs untimely death so the fact that this young Marine was on a dismounted patrol, was struck by an IED, and lost both his legs above the knee was largely ignored. It was kind of crazy. I saw his friends on Facebook cursing Jobs and all those who posted about him because they were upset and rightly so. You see in a span of a week we lost two of our Marines in July, one to an IED and one to an accident here in the states. The wounds are still fresh then we have one lose both his legs and it hits home even harder, meanwhile, the world is concerned with a technology innovator and not our brother. Anger and rage rise up because people value the inventor of the iPhone more than the ones who make this country safe for them. It's a sign of the times I guess.


Yes, I understand that Jobs was responsible for some great things but the bottom line is this. If it weren't for that kid with a gun in some God forsaken place soaking up hardships without a second thought, watching his brothers get maimed and killed, silently hoping to make it home, and sacrificing his very soul the Steve Jobs' of the world wouldn't be able to do what they do. Yet his achievements are more important than the kid who years from now will be using his artificial leg as a stabilizing platform for his rifle when he goes hunting. 


Just a few things to leave you with here...


"People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf."
~George Orwell


Grunt:
Term of affection used to denote that filthy, sweaty, dirt-encrusted, foot-sore, camouflage-painted, ripped trouser, tired, sleepy, beautiful little son of a bitch who has kept the wolf away from the door for over 200 years.


~From Green Side Out by Maj. H. Gene Duncan, USMC Retired.


On that note, I'm off to shower, shave and then off to see a friend.